I had this conversation with my mother a few weeks ago which got me thinking. In it, I said something like, “Of course you’re worried. You always worry.” I wasn’t as crass as that because it was my mother and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. Her reply was the surprising part: “Oh, honey, do you think I worry a lot?”
I pointed to the fact that in every conversation we had (daily) she used the word “worry” two to six times. She was completely unaware of this. This had gone on for years, her worry words and my listening, yet she didn’t hear them herself. (I wondered how many things I did that I was completely unaware of and that my kids would call me out on eventually. Karma is a harsh mistress.) From that conversation forward, my mom shifted her language, and while I could still hear worry in her voice, she made the conscious effort to not let it live in her language.
The incident got me thinking about worry and why we do it. We have this delusion that by worrying about something we are lending our support to that issue. We care about that person or thing and we want to make sure there’s a safety bubble surrounding the object of our concern. Building our worry bubble comes from a place of good intention.
This is a complete illusion, of course. We do not make a situation better by worrying about it. In fact, by worrying, we shed an energy over a situation that makes the situation worse. Others can feel that worry and it makes them tense and anxious, not to mention all the toxicity we pour into our own being.
Visionary teacher Michael Bernard Beckwith addresses the need to adopt a Worry Free Diet in his presentation “You Are the Answer.” He says that in order to live and be what you were meant to be on this earth, you need to watch your what you’re putting in to your mind and body. He says we need to stop dropping placeholders in negativity and understand that all that does is release negative toxins in our bodies and make us prematurely old.
Instead, placeholders in positivity and gratitude are a much better choice. Using these, we can fully emerge into our true purpose and full potential. He outlines the Worry Free Diet.
First, you must have your Not-so Ball Soup everyday. When someone says, “There’s just not enough opportunity,” you say, “Not So!”
Second, you add a little cherry-Ohs. When someone approaches you and tells you the economy is going to crash, you say with a smile, “Oh?” (Not to be rude here, but to zero out the negativity.)
Third, you pile on the Grateful-fruit. Go on a hunt and look for all the things you can be grateful for, even the negative things.
His final suggestion is to take up the No-TV dinner, and instead surround yourself with like-minded people who are looking for what is trying to emerge in them as well. (As a TV lover I have a hard time with this one, but I do recognize the cost to our subconscious minds. I try to zero it out with inspirational programs like Beckwith’s.)
Doesn’t this sound like a happier way to be in the world then being a worry wart? That doesn’t sound pleasant at all. Warts are caused by a virus and they spread, just like worry. And they’re not pretty, just like worry. So go ahead. Vaccinate yourself against the worry wart disease with a Worry Free Diet and watch what emerges in your life. You won’t be disappointed.
This is spot on, and how do I know, I live with a worrier. I am going to try the Not so Ball Soup approach. A challenge has been not to be perceived as uncaring or oblivious because I choose not to worry over things beyond my control and view my glass as half full.
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A conundrum, indeed. A constant balancing act. As i sit here on the vet floor with Ms. Bay after she had some sort of seizure type thing this morning, it’s tough to follow this diet. But life is a cycle that way. It’s a good plan. That, I know.
Oh dear I hope it’s not too serious. Ms Bay is such a sweet dog.
Like Janet, I hope it’s not too serious. I am with you (and your beloved 4-legged) in prayers and positive thoughts. xo G
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